life beyond the well…


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Painfully Blossom

“There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” – Anais Nin

I think that I’ve said here before that I don’t like change.  It’s not that I hate it, but once I establish a routine that really works, it becomes difficult for me to embrace ANYTHING that throws off my routine.  If I’m at work and I’ve decided that I’m going to go to lunch at 1:00pm, anything that comes up after about 12:45pm that could potentially throw off my plans is really difficult for me to handle.  I generally follow the same routine to get dressed in the morning and I take the same path to work each day.  When I go to restaurants, I typically order the same meal.  I can be a creature of habit and routine.

It would be great if life would cater to me and my lack of desire to change.  Oh how wonderful that could be.  But it could also be boring, painful, and growth-stunting.

While there are times in our life where we are able to change before the situation necessitates it, those times are few.  As much as we’d all like to believe that we are flexible, I think that if we are honest with ourselves, we can admit that change makes us uncomfortable. And, I think that we can also admit that some of the times where we were truly moved to change was because of pain.  Sometimes it was pain that was our fault, sometimes it was pain inflicted on us by others.  Regardless of the root of the pain, it facilitated a change needed in our lives to help us grow and blossom into who we are now.

There’s also a pain that comes through growth.  This pain may or may not be facilitated or inflicted by ourselves or others.  It’s just that as we continue to move towards who we are called to be, it necessitates that we change. And there’s a point where we have to ask ourselves- would I rather endure the pain of NOT CHANGING and live my life in the comfort zone, or would I rather embrace the pain that comes with change and push myself into the growth zone?

I love the quote that at the beginning because it reminds me that while the change and risk may be painful, it is nothing compared to the pain that may come from refusing to change.  And this isn’t just physical pain.  There’s the pain that comes with knowing that you missed opportunities for growth or success because of a refusal to step outside of your comfort zone.  More than anything, Lord, help us to stay out of our own way.  

That’s really what it comes down to.  When we neglect to change, we’re really standing in our own way of what has been promised to us.  My prayer is that our faith and level of expectation be increased so that we will be willing to do what God asks of us to bring forth the results He desires from us.  It won’t be easy, but it will be worth it.

Be encouraged.  Be faithful.  Be fearless.  Be changed.


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Where I’ve Been…

Sometimes I really hate that time just flies by.  You know, things are happening and you’re living and responding to it…and then one day you wake up and realize that it’s been a few months since you’ve posted on your blog.

I’m gonna do better.  I say that a lot, but I really mean it.  One of the things that I’ve realized in my writing absence is how much I love writing and how much I feel that it helps me process my thoughts and stay balanced.  It’s just something that I need to do for me, and I need to be better about creating the time and space so that it actually happens.  Hold me accountable to it.

So yeah, I haven’t just been avoiding writing.  I’ve been super busy.  Life comes at you fast, you know.  Here’s where I’ve been/what I’ve been up to recently:

As you can see, it’s not you.  It’s totally me.  But I’m back.

 
PS- I’m always on Twitter (@airendee) and I sometimes hang out on Instagram (@airendee).  Hope to see you there soon!