life beyond the well…


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Friday Night Lights

“Turn up the lights in here baby/extra bright, I want y’all to see this/turn up the lights in here, baby/you know what I need/want you to see everything/Want you to see all of the lights” ~Kanye West f. Rihanna “All of the Lights”

This is my second year living back home in rural North Carolina, and many times I find myself amazed at rural values.  Quite simply, there’s nothing like small-town values.  I enjoy knowing students and their families (cousins, sisters, brothers, aunties, grandma and grandpa, etc.) and I find there’s a certain comfort in knowing that building those relationships with students and their families can have extremely positive benefits.

However, when you consider rural life and small town values, sports are a HUGE part of that, which is something that I underestimated as an “outsider” moving in.  On any given Friday night during the fall or winter, you can find gyms or stadiums packed with students, family, and community members; cheering their team on to victory.  In small towns, every game is the big game- and there are a few that are bigger than others, but with every game it’s about pride in your school, your team, and your town.  Oftentimes these games are for bragging rights among family members, fellow church members, and neighborhoods.

But what didn’t really strike me until I sat at the game last night and watched many of my seniors play against our “cross the field” rivals (literally on the other side of our football field and a few other fields), that for many of them, this MAY just be as good as it gets, when considering athletics.

While we fully anticipate,and are well on track to having 100% of our seniors accepted into a four-year college for the third year in a row, many of our students won’t continue with athletics in college, other than playing intramurals, or perhaps club sports.  For many students, especially our males, they live for these Friday night lights.

It’s an interesting, yet sad phenomenon.  Sad, when you consider the statistics and the reasons why students from rural areas DON’T attend college.  In many areas, young men and women who are extremely gifted and talented don’t attend college, despite excelling in many areas- academics and athletics, just being a few.  And for those students, who become alumni, it’s a hard draw for them. I see several in the gyms and the stadiums recalling their own glory days, when they were under those Friday night lights.

At no point do I want to crush the dreams of my students.  However, I feel an incredible responsibility to be honest with them about the likelihood that their athletic prowess will be the source of their success.  I want to push them towards more.  I want the Friday night lights to be a part of their memories, but not the best ones that they have.

Any suggestions on how to make that happen?

Until next time…


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The Best Gifts Come in Small Packages

It’s safe to say that I’m rather particular about gifts.  As it gets closer to my birthday and Christmas, I always provide lists for people so that they can be clued in to the types of things that I like.  I feel that it’s fair, because my interests and needs change over time; and I feel that if you’re going to buy me a gift, I may as well help you get something that will be a definite winner.

My mother thinks that it is incredibly rude for me to provide a list for people, and that I should just be grateful and accepting of whatever the giver wanted to me to have.  I think that is true, to a certain extent (it’s not that I’m ungrateful); however, sometimes just accepting whatever people want you to have puts you in this position of having to feign gratefulness and gratitude.  “Oh, this was JUST what I wanted”- as you hope that your comment is believable to the giver and you pray that God doesn’t strike you down for lying.

Anyhow, I digress.  As you may know, as you get older, Christmas looks a lot different.  Gifts are less in number and more practical.  I’m slowly adjusting to that reality (and I should probably be better about it, considering I’m now 27 years old), and by doing so, receiving gifts that are indeed extremely practical has become alright.  Yet and still, there’s always one gift each year that is the winner, by which I am EXTREMELY delighted and overjoyed.  And here’s what that gift was this year:

Yes!  A Starbucks gift card!  I love Starbucks, but part of the reason that I don’t go frequently is that it’s so difficult for me to justify anywhere from $3-6 for a drink and a piece of cake.  Thus, I usually save it as a Friday morning treat.

However, while this gift is extremely practical and helps me to enjoy life a little more on Friday mornings, this gift was special to me because it came from my baby sister (who’s really not a baby anymore).  She’s got her first job slangin cheeseburgers and fries at McDonald’s and just decided that she was ready to go back to school (after taking a little time off after graduating from high school).  She’s doing such a wonderful job being responsible, and she is blossoming into an even more beautiful young woman.  I’m proud of her.

The fact that my baby sister thought enough of me to spend her hard earned money almost moved me to tears.  I know that for some people that’s not a big deal.  And that’s fine.  But it’s a big deal for me.  I never expect my younger siblings to get me a gift because I know they aren’t in that position.  However she extended herself, and I am super appreciative.

So,yeah.  In case you were wondering, it is indeed true that the best gifts come in small packages.

Until next time…