life beyond the well…

Tag Archives: Life


by 1 Comment

Two Years.

JB

Javaris Brinkley: 4.24.1994-3.7.2011

The days are long, but the years are short.

It’s still difficult to believe that you left us two years ago. It’s still hard to believe that you’re actually not here anymore. You know, now that your classmates are in college, it’s easier for me to believe that you’re on campus somewhere too; studying, having fun, learning, fulfilling your life’s potential and purpose.

But that’s not true. And there’s many a day where I gaze at the picture of you and your classmates in my office, which I keep as a reminder of who I love and who I serve and why I choose to do so in this way, and just wish that it were different.

But it’s not. And it’s still tough to deal with.

We (those of us who love you here- and there are far too many to name) have good days and bad days. There’s the happiness we feel as we think of how much joy you brought to our lives, but there’s also the sad reminder that all we have are memories.  We are able to fondly look at pictures of you, living life to the fullest; but we’re saddened because we didn’t know that our time together would be so short.

We think of you often.  I know I do.  I think you’d be proud of your classmates- they’re all doing so well.  The girl that you loved so dearly, she’s blossomed into an even more amazing young woman who is leading many with the same love and exuberance that made you fall for her in the first place.  She took it really hard- we all did.  But she dug deep, and there’s a light there that wasn’t there before.  Thank you for being her light.  The school where you spent so many hours of your most precious life- it too has blossomed.  There are now little ones on campus, not much younger than your baby sister; and they learn about you as they have PE class in the gymnasium named in your memory.  You were such a wonderful member of our Pride.  And an even more wonderful part of our lives.

A lot has changed in two years.  But one thing hasn’t- we still miss you.

Author’s Note: I also wrote a “One Year Later” reflection on missing Javaris. You can read that here. 

 


by 3 Comments

Be On Time

A huge area for growth for me over the past year has been being on time to work.  For a while, I was flirting with the 8:10-8:15 arrival time instead of the 8:00 standard.  It’s not that I TRIED to be late, I just wasn’t putting a significant effort into being on time.  That, coupled with no real explanation of expectations in regards to arrival and departure times, left me floating with what I perceived as a flexible start time to the day.

For this year, I’ve made it a priority for me to not just be on time to work, but to be early.  When I was growing up, my mom used to tell me the following:

“To be early is to be on time.  To be on time is to be late.  To be late is unacceptable.”

With being on a time as a priority, I’ve seen a lot of success.  I’ve had to adjust my morning routine and pattern to accomodate for it, but it’s been worth it.  I no longer have the feelings of anxiety that come with rushing and trying to be on time, and gone is the sense of “flusteredness” that I feel after arriving to work late.  And, I’ve been able to get the close parking spots!

As I continue to think about what it means to be on time, I felt God tugging at my heart about the need to be better because I am a reflection of Him.  How can it be that I was made in the image of God, who I say is “on-time”, yet I’m always late?  But even better, how can I witness that I serve a God who is “on-time”, but always be late?

We are called to be ambassadors of Christ, and it’s difficult to do that if we fail to embody the qualities that we say He has.  My pastor says that if we don’t want people to see hypocrites, then we shouldn’t be one.  And while I am always committed to being an excellent represent of Christ, I am especially convicted of this in my workplace, where I am surrounded by so many who don’t believe.  Because I may be the only bible that someone sees, I need to make sure they aren’t lost or confused when they look at me.

So while my initial conviction was to be on time, I realize that the real conviction is to make sure that I’m the best representative of Christ to others and that I’m truly letting my light shine- even in the workplace.

Be encouraged!  Peace and Blessings!