life beyond the well…


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Again- Insufficient Parenting

I thought when I wrote this post on insufficient parenting, I had, for the most part, covered my bases.  And then you have those moments that will let you know just how wrong you are.

Insufficient parenting has gone to another level.

It’s a normal day at work. Students are being students.  Teachers are being teachers.  The day has gone by relatively smoothly, and I’m in my room prepping and reviewing materials for my class, which starts in about 20 minutes.

Out of nowhere, I hear what sounds like the gym erupting in cheers after someone made the game-winning shot. I brush this off, thinking that a class got a little too excited.  But the noise continues.  And gets louder.  Finally, I get up and rush down the hall to the cafeteria, to find it buzzing with energy and excitement.

Outside the cafeteria on the sidewalk, I see a young lady surrounded by her peers.  They appear to be calming her down.  I see another young lady being escorted to the office by a teacher.  And I see a parent of the first young lady, who seemed to arrive really fast for something that just happened to pop off.

I go in the cafeteria and start calming kids down; making sure they are quiet and in their seats.  Then I ask other teachers what happened.  And then I learn of the ULTIMATE case of insufficient parenting.

This ALMOST altercation, loud ruckus, disturbing my work time…was caused by a parent.

A PARENT came to the school, cornered a young lady so that her daughter and her daughter’s friends could fuss her out.

Really?  Sigh.  I can’t make this up.  But you’re a GROWN woman.  Why in the WORLD are you SO involved with your child’s drama that you are coming to school to instigate a fight?

Let me be clear: I am in full support of parental involvement in the life of their child.  I encourage it.  I believe and know from experience that it makes a difference.  HOWEVER, that DOES NOT mean that you should be at your child’s school as a GROWN WOMAN instigating fights with teenagers.  I’m sorry for the confusion.  When you do that, you’ve crossed the line into the realm of insufficient parenting.

So yes.  Just to be clear: being involved in your kid’s life is good.  Helping your kids instigate fights with others is insufficient parenting.

That is all.


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Sometimes My Students Overwhelm Me…

It’s Monday.  I’m moving slow. I’m trying to get my work done in the most efficient way possible.  I’m sitting in my classroom, working; but also listening to the class that’s taking place.  Senior English, filled with a bunch of students who I love dearly and who frustrate me just as much.

Their conversation is on justice and revenge, based out of their current reading of the book “Flight“.  The question posed to the class is about what constitutes justice, and if/when you should pursue revenge…or the idea of “an eye for an eye”.

Most students are explaining why they would pursue revenge and why revenge could be a form of justice.  And then I hear this comment:

“If somebody killed my mom, justice for me would be forgiveness.  If I pursued revenge, I would still have greed and hate in my heart and I wouldn’t feel right; so I feel that the ultimate justice is for me to forgive them.”

The emotion that I felt as I processed that statement, and what it meant was overwhelming.  As I thought about that statement, my eyes welled up with tears.  In a culture that promotes “an eye for an eye” and always getting even as a means of getting ahead; I praise God for students who know and understand the essence of love and forgiveness.

Out of the mouths of babes…

Peace and blessings…