life beyond the well…

Being Twenty-Something

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They call it the “Quarter-life Crisis.” It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn’t know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren’t exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don’t recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren’t really cold, catty, mean, or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job…and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you.

Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn’t. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused.

Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can’t meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you know that you aren’t a bad person.

One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself… and while winning the race would be great, right now you’d just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

So, to all of those being twenty-something you arent alone!

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Author: erin.almond

God-chaser. NC native, now planted in Jacksonville, FL. Happily married to a handsome church-planting pastor. I am easily excited by Jesus, education, cupcakes, Moleskine notebooks, and Pepsi. Overwhelmed by God's amazing grace, undeserving of His love and mercy.

5 thoughts on “Being Twenty-Something

  1. people fear these crises, but they should actually be embraced as an awakening time of revelation.

  2. i definitely agree…crises show you where you are, what you’re made of, and how much faith you truly have. we should be grateful that God loves us enough to put us through these crises so that we may become better.

  3. lol quarter-life crises are the new thing…

    It’s because we achieve so much, so young.

  4. we live in an achievement focused society. Sometimes the pressure is too much to handle. Especially when you have few mentors, the path is unclear and you’ve already accomplished more than you expected. Our kids are going to have preteen crises!

    “What?! I already have AP Calculus credit?! What am I going to do in 7th grade?!” – Rell, Jr.

    erin – do you remember 2003 graduation when we all came back to my house and i just sat on my couch in front of everyone and started crying?! LOLOLOLOL. My family joked about that seriously! I’m so embarrassed now. A lot has changed since then …

  5. I definitely feel you on this one. It’s that point in your life where emotions and characteristics you’ve never had begin to surface. The main one being fear.. what? fear?! haha, clearly up into this point we’ve been fearless right?? conquering everything we’ve gone after.. but for some reason we wonder if we’ll live up to our name, the robust legacy that we’ve made in the short 23 years in our life.. when did we start doubting ourselves? when did we stop walking by faith? when did we see failure as an option whatsoever?

    it’s a hot mess yes.. but thankfully (as least i think) that because of our past experiences our character is in tact enough to withstand this so called “crises” and conquer and prevail. not all of us will make it, but then again.. not all of us are perceptible enough to realize what’s actually happening with ourselves.

    if you get a chance.. read my note on FB “anTe mEridiem.”

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