The other day I realized that since I’ve graduated, a good number of people I know have gotten married or engaged. The marriage bug is in the air, and I believe it’s quite contagious. It’s exciting that people are finding their life partners and that God is (hopefully and prayerfully) blessing their unions.
My lack of dating has made my mother very nervous. Especially since I know so many people who have gotten married or are getting married. It’s interesting that my mother has switched from the mantra of “you can do bad by yourself” to repeatedly asking “So does _________ (insert name of person that she recalls me speaking of) have promise?” or “How’s _________ ?”
When I moved to GA, I went on this whole “independent woman” kick. Well, not really. But for the first time in my life, I was content in being alone. Anyone who’s known me, would know that I’ve (for the most part) always been in a relationship. It might be sufficient to call me a serial monogamist.
Anyhow, it was an empowering experience to be able to grow and explore a new environment for myself. I did things on my own terms. I did things that I wanted to do. I allowed myself to get to know me. What I like. What I don’t like. What I could potentially like under the right circumstances. What I would never like under any circumstances. I developed a great relationship with myself.
Part of the reason that I felt that it was necessary to move to Georgia was so that I could learn how to make it on my own. North Carolina was great. Chapel Hill was awesome. And I did things on my own in Chapel Hill. I was pretty good at paying my rent, getting my car taken care of, and handling my business. But there was always a safety net there. My family was always able and willing to come to my rescue. It’s a blessing to have family who are there and who are supportive, but there are some things that you learn by striking it out on your own.
I believe that there’s a certain power in being alone. In doing things for yourself. And let’s not make the mistake- being alone doesn’t equate to loneliness. There are times when I’m all I’ve got- and that’s definitely enough…and sometimes too much :-). At some point, I’ll join the ranks of my married friends. But until then, I’m growing in the power of being alone and enjoying it.
So, here’s to being alone and doing some work on what lies beneath the tip of the iceberg. As I’ve said before- the majority of the damage done to the Titanic was caused by what lies beneath the surface. Likewise, we will be destroyed not by what exists on the outside, but by what is inside of us.
Peace and Blessings, all!