I’ll start this post with one of my favorite quotes from Sex and the City:
“Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that’s just fabulous.”
I’ve been through some challenges recently, and as I think about it, it’s really come down to me being true to myself; who I am, and what it is that I want for myself. And that sounds pretty simple, and pretty basic. However, I think we’re very easily distracted by the possibilities that we create in our imagination, and fail to trust our intuition. That, can lead to a disaster.
In relationships, you have to know who you are so that your identity doesn’t become lost in the identity of the person you’re with. And I believe that the real hope is that you’ll find someone that loves you for you who you are, as you are. But in order for that to happen, you have to be yourself. Again, sounds simple. However, I think we make it pretty complex.
We’re very cautious in how we reveal ourselves to people because we don’t want to get hurt and we don’t want to be vulnerable. There are these walls that we have up for whatever reason, and it usually has absolutely nothing to do with the person that is attempting to get close to us. Part of being yourself is allowing that side of you to show- with faith that the other party will accept you. Sometimes it’ll happen. Sometimes it won’t. It’s a risk that one has to take.
Yet, if you DON’T do it, you risk even more. You risk being untrue to yourself, allowing yourself to create and maintain this facade, which could crumble at any second; depending on the circumstances. And you also risk hurting someone else, which to me, is one of the worst outcomes of any situation.
I’m proud and confident because at the end of the day, I know that I’ve been truthful and honest with myself. I’m okay with who I am…and if you know me well enough, you know that I LOVE MYSELF (a lot). I can border on being conceited. However, I think that’s a process that one goes through as they began to accept everything about themselves; the good, the bad, and the ugly. Although I’m nowhere close to where I’d like to be, I’m on the right track, and very grateful that I’m not where I could be or where I used to be. I’m a definite work in progress.
There’s a lot in my future that I’m excited for, and that I remain cautiously optimistic about. And through it all, I will continue to embrace who I am and trust myself.