I married Preacherman at 29- which was about 4-5 years longer than I wanted to be single. In my perfect life plan, I would have been married at 24 or 25, with babies coming along around ages 27-28. I’d have finished having babies by 32 (at the absolute latest). And we’d live happily ever after.
So, based on my own perfect life plan, I’m a little behind. And while I generally hate being behind on things, I’m okay with it, because it has been worth the wait.
I love that I know and see so many young women who desire to be Godly wives; who spend their time committed to their church, and pursuing God so that they can be who God has called them to be. And while I know from my own experience that waiting to be found can be a struggle, let me encourage you- IT IS WORTH THE WAIT.
I know that you get tired of hearing it. I know that while you’re happy for your friend, you’re not excited about adding another bridesmaid dress to your closet. I know the excitement of welcoming your friend’s newborn into the world, while wondering if you’ll ever have that life for yourself. But please know, that it IT IS WORTH THE WAIT.
There’s nothing wrong with you for waiting. But don’t wallow. Enjoy your single time. Travel. Shop. Save money. Start your business. Finish that degree. Follow the dreams that God has placed in your heart while you’re waiting- because when you get married, it’s not the same. Marriage requires a consideration that isn’t necessary when you’re single–a consideration of another’s thoughts, dreams, purposes, and plans, and you have to proceed with prayer and caution.
I wish that I could say that I waited patiently to be found by Preacherman. If only that were the case. There were times where I would be content with my singleness, and there were times where I tried to force relationships that I knew weren’t for me. But once I truly committed myself to my singleness, and becoming the best person that I could be, things (slowly) fell into place.
Please know, you are worth the wait- and it’s better to be alone than in bad company. My prayer is that you are able to enjoy this season for the blessing it is and understand the purpose it serves in your life and for the husband and family that you will soon have.
Be encouraged! Peace and Blessings!
April 28, 2015 at 12:25 pm
Though I cannot connect with everything in this post, the general themes I can connect with. I was having a conversation with one of my older “sistas” about being envious (not jealous) of some of my friends. I created this entire life plan professionally, academically, and personally, and most of the things I planned have not come to fruition. This is happening at a time when I see some of my friends doing, or preparing to do, the things that I saw myself doing. They are getting married, buying homes, and starting businesses. Though they are in their mid-twenties, and I am in my early twenties, I don’t see myself prepared to do those things when I am in my mid-twenties. I thought I would be well on my way to doing those things and I won’t be. However, my sista helped me realize that it is ok that I am not in that position, it just means that God has something different in store for me, and it’s ok if my life is not turning out the way that I hoped. I am learning how to enjoy the ride, and discover who I am and what I truly want out of life.