life beyond the well…

Tag Archives: Love


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Make Marriage Look Good

It’s hard to believe, but in a few days (like 8), Preacherman and I will have been married for six months.  This first half-year of our marriage has flown by, and it’s been an incredible experience learning and growing together.

This past weekend, I had the opportunity to visit two places that I haven’t been in a while- my old high school and my former job.  Both were filled with people who haven’t seen me since Preacherman and I got married.  While it was great to catch up with people and see people who I haven’t seen in a bit, I heard variations of the following comments frequently:

“You look so happy!  Marriage really agrees with you!”

“It’s so good to see you!  You look great!  Marriage is treating you well!”

Now, I just smiled and said thank you, because I do agree that marriage agrees with me and is treating me well.  And while I am no marriage expert, I am happily married.  But I was so surprised that so many people were surprised that I look (and am) happily married.

Seriously.  What is this about?  Was I supposed to get married and just fall off?  Was I supposed to get married and become unhappy?  I’m so confused.

Not only am I confused, but I’m also sad that people have associated marriage with unhappiness (both in terms of looks and emotions).  Marriage isn’t supposed to be that way, and I don’t think that anyone enters marriage expecting to be unhappy.  No one agrees to be with someone for the rest of their life with the expectation that it will be horrible.

For those of you who are married, engaged, seriously dating, or plan to be married at SOME point- please do me a favor: MAKE MARRIAGE LOOK GOOD. Be happy.  Enjoy your spouse.  LIKE (and love) your spouse.  Be their FRIEND.  Speak well of them to others.  Do the work that it requires.  Remember and remind them why you love them.  Let us each do our part in promoting marriage as wonderful, fulfilling, engaging, lifelong relationship; instead of something that leads people down the path of despair.

Be encouraged!  Peace and blessings!


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Book Review: Real Love- How to Avoid Romantic Chaos and Find the Path to Lasting Love

“Real love. I’m searching for a real love. Someone to set my heart free…” – Mary J. Blige

Whether we admit it or not, we are all desiring a real love. We smile and feel joy in our hearts at the stories of couples of have been married for 50, 60, and even 70 years; and we often wonder if it’s possible for us to have that same kind of love and marriage. The truth is that it is ABSOLUTELY possible, but you have to go about it in the right way.

That’s where this book comes in. In “Real Love: How to Avoid Romantic Chaos and Find the Path to Lasting Love”, Andy Thompson provides wisdom to those who are seeking to find a lasting love relationship. The book provides simple explanations for how to know if you’re ready to be in a relationship (and reasons why you may not be ready), as well as other valuable tidbits such as “The Three S’s” that men need from their wives and “The Three S’s” that women need from their husbands–and an additional “S” that both husbands and wives need to demonstrate in their marriage.

While the book provides lots of practical wisdom for those who are married, there is also a wealth of knowledge available for those who are in dating relationships. Thompson explains items that should be considered when making “the list” of qualities that one desires in a spouse, the limits and boundaries couples should abide by while they are in the dating phase, and the things that one really needs to know about a person (“The Seven P’s”).

I would recommend this book to people who are hoping to be married so that they can approach their dating relationships with a sense of wisdom instead of being lead by their emotions and how they may feel about a person at the time.  I would also recommend this book to people who are married, as it provides tangible knowledge that can be useful in helping their marriage be the best that it can be.

Being in a successful, long-lasting relationship is not magic.  It requires work from each person involved, but it’s also helpful to begin the relationship with a solid understanding of what lasting relationships require.  While this book doesn’t provide all the answers, it does give you an excellent foundation on which to begin the search for a REAL lasting love.