we can always look back and see how we would have changed things. because we don’t always handle situations in our life the way we should, or the way we wished; we become regretful, remorseful, and consumed wondering about the “what ifs”. i’m currently in one of those situations. i handled a situation in a way that i shouldn’t have, and i’m currently dealing with the consequences…which are very painful. i’m in a healing point, and i’m super sensitive about things right now. it’s very difficult. i’ve been struggling to eat and sleep…but god has kept me.

god has definitely been with me through this time. in some ways i’ve been going through the motions, but at the same time, i feel closer to god. i feel that i’m being cleansed and that god is working with me…i’m just trying to be open and receptive to what god is telling me. god is testing my faith and my obedience and i don’t want to let him down. i’m about to walk into my season…i can feel it. what is key for me is to get past the disappointment that i feel within myself and really focus on the things that god is doing for me.

i’ve probably been praying for myself and for others more than i’ve ever done in my life. i’ve always prayed, but i haven’t quite been the prayer warrior. however, i feel like god is raising me up to be one, so we’ve been talking quite regularly.

despite all the hurt that i’m feeling, i’m SO excited about what god has for me. the visions are becoming plain…and it’s all about getting there. god has a plan and a purpose…and a time. patience…lord grant me some….

so here’s what’s been inspiring me, despite the storm:

*new pre-faith testimony and walking in expectancy

*Romans 8:18- “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.”

*god ALWAYS keeps his promises…

*my friends who have been praying with me and for me…and who have also been listening to me.

*finally…i LOVE that god loves me so much that he sees fit to test me…that is SO tight…