I’ve been wondering this for a while- what happens when you outgrow your friends? It is even possible to outgrow your friends? My thought is that it is- and the proof is that we all know people who were our friends at different points in our lives. You’ve got your college friends, your friends who you were cool with in high school, the elementary buddies that you’ve managed to stay in touch with, and then the people that you meet at your jobs, etc.
The proximity of closeness changes in friendships based on a number of different things. My personal frustrations with my own friends tends to be based out of the fact that it seems like LIFE is happening to us, and “busyness” seems to be the excuse for why we haven’t talked in forever. Now, I know how I operate- and as a friend, you can rank me pretty high on the “most likely to not return a phone call” list. However, in my defense- I send emails…and cards…and I text. Just a different means of expression. But, I feel like in the lives of friends “busyness” should never be an appropriate excuse. Why? Because it’s a convenience. We’re all busy. We all have different things pulling us in different directions. But, you make time for what’s important. So, when I hear, “I’ve been so busy”, what I understand is “I don’t really have time for you.” Hmm…
…but I digress. So, what do you do when you outgrow your friends and how do you know when that has taken place? Do you just count your losses and acknowledge that it was good for what it was, when it was? Has it happened when you realized that you haven’t talked for months, and if someone asked you what was good with the person, you honestly wouldn’t know? And how do you handle that situation?
“The best discovery true friends can make is that they can grow separately without growing apart.”
“There’s these people you’ve known forever. Who like…know you…in this way that other people can’t. Because they’ve seen you change. They’ve let you change.” ~My So-Called Life