One of my huge areas for growth has been my focus. Not in the sense of focusing on tasks to accomplish (although that could greatly improve), but really improving my focus on where I am and what I have, as opposed to where I’m not and what I don’t have.
Last weekend was my bridal shower/bachelorette weekend. My best friend and my “little sister/adult daughter” put together an amazing weekend of events to celebrate me and my upcoming nuptials. In short, it was fabulous. I am so grateful for all of the time, money, and energy they put in to making the weekend a success. It definitely allowed me to reflect on something that the hubs-to-be says often: “People don’t have to be nice, and they definitely don’t have to be nice to you.” I’m grateful that I not only have NICE people in my life, but people who extend that niceness, kindness, and compassion towards me.
However, during the course of the weekend, there were moments where I found my mind drifting, and wondering things such as “Why isn’t ________ here?” or “I wonder why _______ couldn’t come” or “I really thought that ____________ would be here today”. Somewhere in the midst of having those thoughts, I realized how wrong they were. I mean, here I am enjoying an entire weekend thoughtfully planned by others (including gifts, cake, girl time, and more food), but I’m choosing to focus my energy on the things that I have somehow assessed to be “missing”.
That’s not cool.
On a base level, it’s not cool because it renders me ungrateful. And who wants to be that? But how many times are we like that with God? We are so caught up in what we think might be missing, that we overlook and fail to adequately appreciate what we have. It’s like God providing us with a table of all of our favorite foods, but we’re upset because the only option for drinks is water…instead of being grateful for the food and the drink that is provided.
It’s also not cool because our (momentary) ungratefulness ignores the fact that there may be purpose in our lacking. Could it possibly be that we are doing without something because God is trying to teach us, grow us, better us? Or maybe it’s just not good for us. Or maybe it’s just not what we need. If God has already given us everything we need for a godly life (2 Peter 1:3), then us NOT having something means that we probably don’t NEED it. If He promises not to withhold any good thing from those whose walk is blameless (Psalm 84:11), then our doing without something is probably more about us than it is about Him (but that’s a different post for a different time).
But also, it wasn’t an adequate representation of what I felt. That twinge where I lost focus wasn’t how I TRULY felt about the situation. And I had to make that assessment, quickly and carefully. If I failed to do so, that twinge could’ve grown and had me all in my feelings about something that was (a): false and (b): unnecessary. Once I told that twinge to go away, and I refocused, I was able to recognize and be grateful for what I had, which quite honestly, was a lot greater than what I perceived to be lacking.
How many times have I overlooked what I have because I’m so concerned with what I feel may be lacking? I’m not sure. But I know that going forward I’m committed to making sure that I’m focused on the right things and truly grateful for my blessings.
“His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.” -2 Peter 1:3
“For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless.” -Psalm 84:11